Apr 25, 2024
Brothers and sisters, we do not want you to be uninformed about those who sleep in death, so that you do not grieve like the rest of mankind, who have no hope. For we believe that Jesus died and rose again, and so we believe that God will bring with Jesus those who have fallen asleep in him. (1 Thessalonians 4:13-14)
These are perhaps some of the more well known words from the book
of 1 Thessalonians. I know I became aware of them in grade 7
after the death of my uncle. These are go-to words for
funerals.
Some have twisted these words to suggest that Christians ought not to grieve. Instead, that we should just wave death away as if it were nothing to be sad about at all—“they’re in a better place,” we say. Or, “God has a plan.” But in fact, when we use those statements or this text to skip over the pain and sorrow of losing some dear person, we have actually missed the point of all of it and perhaps even wounded ourselves or someone else in the process.
Paul never suggests that Christians ought not to grieve. Indeed, the Bible is full of examples of heart-sick and painful seasons of grief and weeping over the death and loss of so many things, including the people we love. Lament over the things that are not right but that we cannot change is a major thread through the Psalms. We even see Jesus weeping at the death of his friend, Lazarus—even though Jesus is himself the resurrection and the life!
So we ought not hear Paul wrongly here. Grief is not a sign of weak faith: it is a sign of deep love—the very thing that Christians are commanded most highly to have. What Paul does say is that when we grieve—because we will grieve—we do so with hope.
Our culture increasingly avoids death. A few years ago, an aunt of mine died in Las Vegas where she had lived for decades. A visitation was held before the funeral in a little chapel on site at the cemetery. A number of the people who came steered clear of the front of the sanctuary where her body lay. Some didn’t even enter the room—admitting that the reason was their fear of facing the reality of death. They signed the guest book and got out. That was an odd experience for my family members who were present. Visitation lines around the casket are still a routine expectation in the rural small-town community I grew up in. But this is increasingly foreign to the secular world in which we live.
More and more often, the deceased does not attend their own funeral. Visitations happen less frequently, and sometimes the body or remains of the deceased do not show up there either. At least in part, that’s because the secular world offers us no hope or story that can ground us in a world of meaning that transcends death’s finality. So we avoid it altogether.
For Christians, this is different though. We do have a story. And we do have hope. It is a peculiar tradition that Christians hold of caring for the bodies of their dead, and accompanying those bodies every last step of the earthly journey—all the way to the graveside—and doing so with singing, confessions of faith, and proclamations of the hope of resurrection. Not only is facing death’s cold reality an important psychological step in the journey of grieving—it is also an act of faith that our world without faith increasingly cannot take. They grieve without hope.
As Christians though, we are able to face the death of our loved ones. It is not easy. But we do it, because we stand together in the faith and hope that “Jesus died and rose again:” the sure promise that “God will bring with Jesus those who have fallen asleep in him.” It is important that we do this together, because those closest to the loss cannot always hold on to this hope or sing the songs of resurrection themselves. So we do it for them as the Christian community. We carry them with our songs, prayers, and confessions of faith, trusting that this hope we’ve placed in Jesus’ final word of life will carry us all until he comes again.
As you journey on, go with the blessing of God:
May God himself, the God who makes everything holy and whole, make you holy and whole, put you together—spirit, soul, and body—and keep you fit for the coming of our Master, Jesus Christ. The One who called you is completely dependable. If he said it, he’ll do it! The amazing grace of Jesus Christ be with you! (1 Thessalonians 5:23,24,28 The Message).